18年加州系统文书写作指导上

加州大学的申请文书，是需要学生从学校给出的8个问题中，自由选择四个问题进行回答，从不同角度对自己进行多方位的描述。这对于平时写一篇文书都很吃力的学生来说，加州大学的申请文书写起来无意是有难度的。

因此在申请的最后关头，为了让大家能把文书修改的更完美，老师特意与国外招生官沟通，对加州大学Personal Insight Questions（个人陈述文书）的要求进行深入的解读，帮大家寻找写作灵感！

加州大学的「个人观点问题」解读

什么是「个人观点问题」？你在说什么？加州大学不接受普通形式的申请文书？！这是真的，但也你不必灰心丧气。你还是可以用同一篇文书来申请加州系统中的9所学校，我会尽力帮你。

But what’s that? What did you say? UC doesn’t accept the Common App?! Yes, it’s true, but don’t eat your shirt. You can use the same UC app for any of the nine UC undergrad programs, and I’m here to help.

那么我们有哪些需要解决的问题呢？加州大学的申请系统提出了8个问题，你需要从中选择4题作答，而且每一题的答案要控制在350个单词。答案要求的字数确实不多，但也没有想象中那么少。正常情况写文书，当你写了200多个单词，你就会想要把答案分成2-3段。

So what are we dealing with? The UC App gives us eight lovely prompts. We must choose four prompts to answer with a limit of 350 words for each. These are short answers, but not that short. If you write over 200 words, you will still want to break your response into two or three paragraphs.

这比普通的申请文书也简单了许多（普通申请文书的字数要求是650个单词），而且简短的文书更加注重内容而非写作技巧。但于此同时，你也需要构思四个观点，而不是一个。这对于部分考生来说倒还好，但对于另一部分考生来说，就是件头疼的事情了。

This is EASIER than the Common App essay (650 words) because the shorter essays focus more on content than writing skill. But you need four essay ideas instead of one, which is fine for some students, but painful for others.

“需要表达的重点有三项：你是谁？你认为什么是重要的？你想和加州大学分享些什么？”这是加州大学招生部门给出的说法。要求你的答案具体明确，独树一帜。这就像情侣约会一样，加州大学想要更多的了解你。明白吗？加州大学甚至还写了指南，用来帮助你回答他们所提出的问题。多么善解人意，快去阅读吧！

8大问题的分析与应对

有两种方式：

Two ways：

第一种，拿出一张纸，并标上从1到8这8个数字。然后依次阅读问题，审题的同时，在对应的题号后面写下脑海中的观点或想法。看看哪些题目令你灵感突现？哪些题目令你激动不已？或者说，哪些题目至少没有令你无可奈何，痛苦不堪？迅速下笔，相信你的直觉。

First, get a sheet of paper and number it 1) through 8). Then read through the 8 UC prompts. When you read each prompt, write down any ideas or thoughts that pop into your head. Which prompts did you have immediate ideas about? Which prompts did you feel excited to write about? Or, at least, which prompts didn’t make you groan? Do this fast and trust your instincts.

第二种，想清楚你要在申请文书中呈现的个人经历或品质。然后选择一个能够最大程度的让你表达你的经历或品质的问题。

Second, think about the experiences or qualities you want to demonstrate in your application. Then choose the prompts that will give you the best opportunity to write about those experiences and qualities.

接下来我们来看下这些问题。

Now let’s look at the prompts.

问题一：描述一次表现你领导力的经历，包括你积极正面地影响他人、帮助集体解决争论或你为集体作出的贡献。

Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.

你是否有可以展示出你领导力的经历？你是否可以用讲故事的方式来进行表达？如果有，就选择这个问题；如果没有，就继续思考。体现领导力的经历可以涵盖方方面面：比如组织社会活动，或者成为竞技运动队伍的领袖。

Do you have a moment of leadership you could tell a story about? Then chose this prompt! If you think you don’t, then think again. Leadership experiences could include anything from organizing social events being the captain of a competitive e Sports team.

作答关键在于选择一个具体的经历，并通过讲故事的方式呈现出来。不要盲目地列举自己的简历。相反，展示出其中的一个时刻，以此来展现出自己性格当中一些全新的东西。

The key is to choose a specific experience and tell it like a story. Don’t get lost listing your resume. Instead, show us a moment. Reveal something new about your character.

问题二：每个人都有创造性的一面，并且通过不同的方式体现出来：比如解决问题的能力、创新思维、甚至艺术方面等等。描述一下你是如何表现自己的创造性的?

Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.

如果你是一个充满艺术细胞的人，那选择这一题就是明智之举。但这一题几乎对于任何人来说都是一个优势。尽量描写出你在解决一个困境时所采取的充满创造力的方法，或者展示你是如何解决一个工程或科学难题的。

If you’re an artistic person, this is a winning choice. But this question can be great for almost anyone. Try describing a creative way you resolved a tough social situation, or explain your solution to an engineering or science problem.

再次强调，最佳答案不是去讲述创造力而是去展示它。例如：

Again, the best answers to this question won’t just TELL about creativity; instead they will SHOW that creativity. For example:

发动机在运转，车轮也在转动，但汽车却还一动不动。已经晚上9点了，我们却还陷在距离市区数英里的泥地中。为了远足，我和朋友们筹划了整整一周，但现在我们沾满烂泥，筋疲力尽，无比沮丧。我们已经竭尽全力 ...（接下来作者就将描述，他是如何运用充满创造力的方式把汽车移出泥潭的）。

The engine revved, the wheels spun, but the car didn’t move. It was 9:00 at night, we were miles from the city, and we were stuck in deep mud. My friends and I had planned all week to go hiking that night, but now we were muddy, tired, and frustrated. We tried everything . . . [The writer would continue to describe his creative solution to moving the car out of the mud].

问题三：你认为自己最大的才能或技能是什么？一直以来你是如何培养和表现这一能力的？

What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?

有些才能是显而易见的，例如唱歌。但还有很多其他的才能。你是否擅长组织活动，社交，追逐时尚或者会修手机？

Some talents are obvious, for example, if you sing on television. But there are MANY other talents. Are you good at organization, networking, fashion, or fixing cell phones?

我想再强调一下这个问题的第二部分。它甚至比前半部分还要重要。这个问题目的是让你描述自己是如何培养才能的，也就是展示你的自律、毅力以及学习的意愿。

I want to emphasize the second part of this question. It may be MORE important than the first part. This question wants you to describe how you have developed talent, meaning they want you to demonstrate your discipline, perseverance, and willingness to learn.

因此不要仅仅罗列出你的才能和成就，要重点描述你为了获得某个才能而战胜的挑战。

So DON’T just list your talents and accomplishments. DO describe the challenges you overcame to acquire your talent.

问题四：描述你是如何利用一次重要的教育机会，或者如何努力克服你面对的教育障碍的?

Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.

注意，你可以描述机会或者障碍，这个问题比较大众化。如果你想谈论机会或障碍对你的激励，那这个问题是一个不错的选择。

Note that you can write about opportunities OR barriers, so this question should apply to everyone. If talking about your opportunities/barriers inspires you, this question is a good choice.

不要过多地关注障碍或者机会本身，要关注你自己以及自己克服障碍或者抓住机会的具体方式。学校想要知道你对学习充满热情，并懂得如何充分利用资源。回答这一问题的方式之一，便是展示自己将如何充分利用加州大学所提供的资源。

Don’t focus too much on the barrier or opportunity itself. Focus on yourself and some specific ways you overcame or took advantage of it. Schools want to know that you are passionate about learning and that you know how to make the most of resources. A good way to conclude this essay is by explaining how you will take advantage of some specific opportunities offered by UC.